


Ice Box Correspondence

by NnoitraSzayel, WildeWolf221 (orphan_account)



Category: Bleach
Genre: Humour
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-23
Updated: 2012-06-23
Packaged: 2017-11-08 09:43:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 427
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/441853
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NnoitraSzayel/pseuds/NnoitraSzayel, https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/WildeWolf221
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Advertisements, love notes, poems, random crack... this is what goes on the Seireitei refrigerator. Posts by captains and lieutenants.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> first posted December 14, 2009

It all started when Mayuri decided to post an ad on the fridge. The chaos exploded from there far into the future... As you shall see!

**Help Wanted!**

Any person or persons willing to be experimented on are greatly appreciated! Age, physical health and other factors are no obstacle, all that is needed is a willingness to be experimented on!

<3 Mayuri

Mayuri,

Please refrain from posting advertisements on the fridge.

Thank you,

-Yamamoto

Mayuri,

I'm perfectly willing to be _experimented_ on, Kurotsuchi-taichou.

-Gin ^.^

Gin,

No. Just no. This is Mayuri-sama we're talking about. He says no.

-Matsumoto Rangiku

Ran-chan,

You're no fun! I just wanted a little change of pace is all...

-Gin T.T

Gin,

Change of pace! He'll rearrange your insides!

-Rangiku .

Ran-chan,

Guess I'll just have to rely on you then.

-Gin ;)

Gin and Rangiku,

NOT ON THE FRIDGE!

-Yamamoto

Ichimaru-taichou and Matsumoto-fukutaichou,

Please refrain from posting your foreplay on the refrigerator.

-Kuchiki-taichou


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the broccoli is a lie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first posted December 14, 2009

_Shifting silver moonlight,_

_Cascades across alabaster planes;_

_Deep blue skies,_

_Reflect the depth of a soul;_

_Sparkling white stars,_

_Reveal the levity of the eyes._

-Shunsui Kyouraku

Shunsui,

…... You do realize this is a refrigerator it's used for _storing food in the cold_ , not posting _love notes_ addressed to no one.

-Hitsugaya

P.S. When does the next shipment of watermelon come in?

Toshiro-bo,

You obviously do not understand the needs of an artist. The person to whom that poem was written will know it's for them.

-Shunsui

Hitsugaya-kun,

The next shipment of watermelon comes in next week.

-Momo

Shunsui,

Whatever.

Hinamori,

But what am I supposed to eat until then?

-Hitsugaya

Hitsugaya-kun,

Eat broccoli. It's supposed to make you taller!

-Momo

Hinamori,

Not funny. Just remember who you're talking to...

-Hitsugaya

Hitsugaya,

I know, _taichou_. But you'll always be Whitey-chan to me!

-Momo

Sui,

Honestly? The fridge? The public fridge?

-Ukitake

Momo,

We all know THE BROCCOLI IS A LIE! And that pet name is very demeaning.

-Hitsugaya

Whitey-chan!

-Yachiru 3

I knew I shouldn't have eaten all that broccoli as a child...

-Isane T.T

Shiro,

What better place than the public fridge?

-Sui

Sui,

Gee, I don't know, it's _public_?

-Shiro

Shiro,

Exactly! What better place to declare my poetic leanings?

-Sui

Sui,

Does the word privacy mean nothing to you?

-Shiro

Everyone,

Erm... Would it kill you to clear the fridge?

-Soifon

Shiro,

Privacy is a relative term. Would you rather all of Seireitei knew?

Soifon,

Didn't your mother ever teach you not to interrupt a lover's quarrel?

\- Sui

....

-Soifon

Sui,

Well, they do now.

-Shiro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we never wrote more than this... and probably won't write anymore, as it was so long ago.


End file.
